Mayonnaise

According to Ms. Julia Child, "Mayonnaise...is a process of forcing eggs to absorb a fatty substance, oil in this case, and to hold it in thick and creamy suspension." I don't know exactly why, but I love that and now that I have made mayo, it makes the process make perfect sense.

Julia says that you can make mayonnaise one of two ways.
1. With a wisk or an electric hand mixer
2. with a blender.

"Blender mayonnaise uses a whole egg rather than egg yolks; it is almost automatic and no culinary skill whatsoever enters into its preparation."

"Mayonnaise made by hand or with an electric beater requires familiarity with egg yolks... and you should be able to make it by hand as part of your general mastery of the egg yolk."

Well I certainly couldn't handle the shame that making blender mayonnainse would have rained down on Some Assembly Required, so I opted for the electric hand mixer, and embarked on achieving my general mastery of the egg yolk.

Temperature:
Everything needs to be at room temperature. Julia suggests warming the mixing bowl with hot water before beginning to take a chill off.

3 egg yolks
1 Tablespoon Wine Vinegar of Lemon Juice (I used white wine vinegar)
1/2 teaspoon spalt
1/4 teaspoon dry or prepared mustard (I don't know what she means by "prepared mustard" I used dijon.)
11/2 - 21/4 cups olive oil, salad oil or a mixture of both. If you are a novice, use the minimum amount. (I did not read this novice advice until just now. It would have made the process shorter and easier. I used almost 2 cups of oil)
2 tablespoons of boiling water.

Add the egg yolks to a 3 quart mixing bowl and beat for 1-2 minutes until they are thick and sticky.

Add the vinegar or lemon juice, salt and mustard. Beat for 30 seconds more.

The egg yolks are now ready to receive the oil. The oil must be added very slowly drop by drop. (I used condiment dispensers with a very tiny opening. I got them at the 99¢ store.) You must not stop beating until the sauce has thickened. (This is why I think that the electric mixer is a much better choice than the whisk unless you are trying to develop your Popeye forearms) Stop pouring and continue beating every 10 seconds or so, to be sure the egg yolks are absorbing the oil. After 1/3 cup to 1/2 cup of oil has been incorporated, the sauce will thicken into a very heavy cream and the crisis is over. (Crisis?!)  Beat in the remaining oil by 1 to 2 tablespoon dollops, blending thoroughly after each addition. (I just squirted larger amounts from the ketchup dispenser)

When the sauce becomes too thick and stiff, beat in drops of vinegar or lemon juice to thin it out. Then continue with the oil.

Beat the 2 Tablespoons of boiling water into the sauce. This is an anti-curdling insurance. (I forgot this step and it was fine. Now curdling disaster, so no insurance needed.)

Season to taste.